I feel like since about August I can't seem to get grip on anything. I am always behind, unprepared and when I do get around to something that's needs to be done I don't do it as well as I should or would like. This past week had been a whirlwind. I am been home very little which makes me sad because I am such a homebody and I love being home oriented.
Yesterday I had some time to do a little thinking about how to get our family where it use to be; laid back and uneventful. I have realized that every season of life will allow you to pick something up and let something go. We are now in a season change (and i don't mean fall to winter). I mean as in my monthly, weekly and daily focuses need an over haul. Not that they were wrong but with each new season come new focus. I want to be more focused on making sure our home is a home and not a house, making sure I am present when I am with Micaiah and being mentally, physically and emotionally ready for my husband when he needs me. I have a bad habit of being a busy body and when the end of the day rolls around I realize I have accomplished nothing. I, for whatever reason put pressure on myself to get EVERYTHING done EVERYDAY even things that are trivial. I need to have a few focuses each day that are planned, intentional and fruitful. So with that I am letting go of a few things that I feel like I should do and blogging is one of them. I am not signing off bloger completly but now that we are home schooling in the morning and I am working in the afternoons I have only a little time to do what NEEDS to be done and do it well. Basically this post is taking the pressure off myself to not have "blogging" on the to do list every other day. We will still be here and from time to time i'll update you on big happenings of our life but you won't be hear from me often. I want to make sure that as a stay at home mom and wife my main focuses are daily time with the Lord, investing and being present for my child and being a help mate and cheer leader for my husband. Beyond that, I am taking a leave of absent. :)
Friday, November 18, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
I don't know how they do it.....
Back in Feb Clark had surgery and racked up a pretty hefty bill. Just before vacation I had to go to the ER with a back spasms and racked up another hefty bill. Then in late Aug (after several dr. Visits) we found out we had a miscarriage follow by several more dr. App. Then 2 weeks ago we found out we have to have our AC unit replaced. Needless to say the bills have pilled up. Technically we have funds in savings to some of these bills could be paid off and have we have money left over at the end of month to make payments on the rest but after restling with how to work each bill and blah blah I told Clark I didn't want to do either. That instead I wanted to get a part time job. That way we can continue to save but also pay these bills off. He said that was totally my decision and that there was no pressure for me to work and ask if I felt obligated to help. I of course said I didn't feel pressure and didn't feel obligated. I love that my hubby is thoughtful like that.
So several weeks ago I started the process of part time (or less than part time) hunting for a job. I knew I needed it to be flexible, little hours and it had to be something I could bring Micaiah to. So I went back to what I know, childcare. Either something in my home or working half days in some else's home. After putting the word out about a week later our preschool director approached me about a family who was looking for someone to come to their house Monday-Thursday from 230-6. After talking to both the mom and dad I felt like this was a good fit for me and Micaiah. I am in my 3rd week and have really enjoyed it. It's very laid back and fun for Micaiah.
I get here just before the kids get off the bus and then we hang out and play until one of the parents arrive. They have a 7 year old daughter who is spunky, inquisitive and ALL girl! Fun times for me! They also have a 4 (almost 5) year old little boy who is quiet and shy but will occasional come out of his shell and be crazy which is fun for Micaiah!!!
We had to make some changes in our very laid back, fly by the seat of our pants kind of schedule. I now get up at 6 every morning so that I can fit everything into our day by 2. Quiet time, breakfast, a few household to do's and then we are off to the gym and run errands. I typically try to get both of those done in 2- 2 1/2 hours. That's pushing it. Then it's back home to start lunch, shower and change, take care of several more house things (cleaning, laundry, bills, important phone calls, etc). At 1 I try to have Micaiah in quiet time so I can either prep dinner or make it in full and then walk out the door at 2. I basically have to have a full days to do list done by 2pm. By the time I walk by in the door after 6 I have just enough energy to finish dinner, eat and start Micaiah's bedtime routine. By the time he goes to bed I am pooped. I've been falling into bed around 9 and asleep before 10. Did I also mention that I have a cleaning job in the morning, a lunch buddy that I have to visit once a week (I'll eventually get around to blogging about this.), sub at New Vision Preschool occasionally AND a husband to spend time with.
I don't know how they do it! You know, the full time working mama's. They come home and still have a full days of house work to do in 3-4 hours, need to spend time with the kids and there husband. I think maybe they are super hero's!
Speaking of business, got go! Lot's to do
So several weeks ago I started the process of part time (or less than part time) hunting for a job. I knew I needed it to be flexible, little hours and it had to be something I could bring Micaiah to. So I went back to what I know, childcare. Either something in my home or working half days in some else's home. After putting the word out about a week later our preschool director approached me about a family who was looking for someone to come to their house Monday-Thursday from 230-6. After talking to both the mom and dad I felt like this was a good fit for me and Micaiah. I am in my 3rd week and have really enjoyed it. It's very laid back and fun for Micaiah.
I get here just before the kids get off the bus and then we hang out and play until one of the parents arrive. They have a 7 year old daughter who is spunky, inquisitive and ALL girl! Fun times for me! They also have a 4 (almost 5) year old little boy who is quiet and shy but will occasional come out of his shell and be crazy which is fun for Micaiah!!!
We had to make some changes in our very laid back, fly by the seat of our pants kind of schedule. I now get up at 6 every morning so that I can fit everything into our day by 2. Quiet time, breakfast, a few household to do's and then we are off to the gym and run errands. I typically try to get both of those done in 2- 2 1/2 hours. That's pushing it. Then it's back home to start lunch, shower and change, take care of several more house things (cleaning, laundry, bills, important phone calls, etc). At 1 I try to have Micaiah in quiet time so I can either prep dinner or make it in full and then walk out the door at 2. I basically have to have a full days to do list done by 2pm. By the time I walk by in the door after 6 I have just enough energy to finish dinner, eat and start Micaiah's bedtime routine. By the time he goes to bed I am pooped. I've been falling into bed around 9 and asleep before 10. Did I also mention that I have a cleaning job in the morning, a lunch buddy that I have to visit once a week (I'll eventually get around to blogging about this.), sub at New Vision Preschool occasionally AND a husband to spend time with.
I don't know how they do it! You know, the full time working mama's. They come home and still have a full days of house work to do in 3-4 hours, need to spend time with the kids and there husband. I think maybe they are super hero's!
Speaking of business, got go! Lot's to do
Friday, October 21, 2011
Oh, my sweet, fun friends!
This past weekend Micaiah and I went to Louisville so Amber and I could keep our friends kids while they went on a fall retreat with their church. Thursday night before they left my sweet friends took me to my favorite place in Louisville to eat. Shogun Japanese steakhouse! YUM-ME! Afterwards, we (they) stopped for ice cream. Oh the fun times we have when the 4 us are together. I think our time in Louisville will always be some of my all time favorite times. These girls and I share so many fun memories and were there for each other during some hard times. I am so thankful that we still live so close! On saturday, Amber and I tool all the kids to Chick fill a and then to the park. The weather was perfect! Then saturday night, after all the parents got home Amber and I went and saw Footloose. Best remake ever. We really enjoyed it and I couldn't imagine seeing it with any one else!
Smores anyone?
The past fews weeks it seems like once a week we've been around some type of fire with friends roasting marshmallows, making smores and creating fun memories!
A month ago we had some friends over for chili and smores! We had some good laughs that night and Clark had his man car taken away. He has since gotten back.
Then 2 weeks ago we went to a camp out (we didn't stay for the actually sleeping part just the food and games) but we still have a blast!
Then, tonight while my family from Florida was in town we roasted again! It was my nieces first time roasting smores. My sister has ben depriving her.
I think I have figured out the perfect smore. You start by roasting the marshmallow until it's about to fall off the stick, after place the marshmallow in the crackers and chocolate you then place the smote back by the fire for several minutes to melt the chocolate. Oh yeah baby, that way the whole thing is "ooy gooey"
A month ago we had some friends over for chili and smores! We had some good laughs that night and Clark had his man car taken away. He has since gotten back.
Then 2 weeks ago we went to a camp out (we didn't stay for the actually sleeping part just the food and games) but we still have a blast!
Then, tonight while my family from Florida was in town we roasted again! It was my nieces first time roasting smores. My sister has ben depriving her.
I think I have figured out the perfect smore. You start by roasting the marshmallow until it's about to fall off the stick, after place the marshmallow in the crackers and chocolate you then place the smote back by the fire for several minutes to melt the chocolate. Oh yeah baby, that way the whole thing is "ooy gooey"
Two of my favorite things....
Several weeks ago I loaded up and headed to Louisville only to head out to Lexington. Something I've done before....all for the sake of 2 of my favorite things!
It's become a tradition for my best friend and I to go to 1 or 2 football games each year, together. My Uncle Daniel sends his extra Florida Gator tickets to us when they play, Vandy, UT or UK out of state. I have NO girl-friends who like football like I do or who are willing to go, EXCEPT AMBER! So every year that my uncle sends us tickets, I head her way or she heads my way for the games! The funny in this is that she is a UK fan and a UT fan so she always has to sit in the Gator section and she's always on the losing team. Ha! In Sept, UK played FL in Lexington so I drove up by myself for a weekend get away to enjoy 2 of my favorite things - Amber and the Gators!
It's become a tradition for my best friend and I to go to 1 or 2 football games each year, together. My Uncle Daniel sends his extra Florida Gator tickets to us when they play, Vandy, UT or UK out of state. I have NO girl-friends who like football like I do or who are willing to go, EXCEPT AMBER! So every year that my uncle sends us tickets, I head her way or she heads my way for the games! The funny in this is that she is a UK fan and a UT fan so she always has to sit in the Gator section and she's always on the losing team. Ha! In Sept, UK played FL in Lexington so I drove up by myself for a weekend get away to enjoy 2 of my favorite things - Amber and the Gators!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Are you ok?
Are you ok? How are you doing? If you need to talk.....
These are a couple of things we've been asked or have had said to us. Its been 1 month, 2 weeks and 6 days since we found out our baby, that we had tried so long for was no longer living so how am I doing? Well, Clark is doing well, which is normal for men. He has been very tender and patient with me. He is so wonderful! I, on the other hand have good days and bad. Today was a good day :)
I am over the initial heartbreak of the miscarriage and honestly I think I would be doing better but there is something very unique about the timing of our miscarriage that will make the healing process last a lot longer. The same day we announced our pregnancy to Clark's family, his brother and his wife announced they too were pregnant. After doing some math we determine we were no more than 2 weeks part.....
The first couple of weeks after the miscarriage, looking back, I was very numb to the whole process and then little by little I started breaking down and allowed myself, even though it was painful, to mourn. After talking with several people we have decided not to name our baby. After all, the Lord did not give the baby to us to name. After about a week and a half of some deep, hard emotions I was putting Micaiah to bed one night and it hit me. How amazingly beautiful the gift of Micaiah's life is. Not that I didn't know it before but it was so strong in that moment and my heart began to change from sad to grateful. I found in the coming days that the Lord used Micaiah to be my comfort. I couldn't hug or kiss him enough. I couldn't stop looking at him or get enough of his sweet voice. We have talked to Micaiah about what happened. We have been very open and honest with him. He has asked a couple of times about it but not in the last 2 weeks or so.
By late September things had started to feel a little normal around here. I started to feel ok again. Then one day I received an invitation in the mail to my nieces birthday party, my sister in laws little girl. Instantly I was very anxious. Almost a little panic-e. After feeling like i was getting a grip on things I realized I would come face to face with the physical reminder of our miscarriage. Something I knew I was not ready for. We live abbot 3 1/2 hours from my brother and sister in law and had not seen them since the announcement. For over a week I prayed and sought counsel because I was feeling so anxious. It would be like walking through the initial pain all over again. I don't want to go there Lord. I'm not ready In the times of praying I always thought "where are you Lord? why can't i feel you? why are you not calming my anxious heart" I was getting frustrated because he wasn't making this better. Later I would come to fond out he was working all along and telling me to wait when the only answer I was willing to hear was "okay I'll make every thing just dandy". Long story short, my sis in law came to visit my in laws (who live in Murfreesboro) kind of last minute exactly a week before my nieces party. Clark drug me to dinner kicking and screaming. After a really bad start to the night the ending was beautiful. It's what the Lord has been working on and preparing me for.
My sis in law called me into the back room and after a lengthy conversation (which shall remain mostly private) the Lord had calmed my anxious heart. You see, in that conservation my sis in law freed me from the burden of expectation. The expectation that I had to be present ...in HER presence. Something that is incredible painful for me right now. She told me to take as long as I needed to have space. I am so thank for her understanding and sympathy in our unique situation. Something I didn't even have to ask for but that she graciously gave. For even though her little one will always be a reminder of our miscarriage, one day the wound will be manageable. Something only the Lord can do with time and space.
The Lord has been my great comfort and strength in this time. He is teaching me things and doing things in me. Building character, refining me and increasing my dependence on HIM.....for that I am eternally grateful.
These are a couple of things we've been asked or have had said to us. Its been 1 month, 2 weeks and 6 days since we found out our baby, that we had tried so long for was no longer living so how am I doing? Well, Clark is doing well, which is normal for men. He has been very tender and patient with me. He is so wonderful! I, on the other hand have good days and bad. Today was a good day :)
I am over the initial heartbreak of the miscarriage and honestly I think I would be doing better but there is something very unique about the timing of our miscarriage that will make the healing process last a lot longer. The same day we announced our pregnancy to Clark's family, his brother and his wife announced they too were pregnant. After doing some math we determine we were no more than 2 weeks part.....
The first couple of weeks after the miscarriage, looking back, I was very numb to the whole process and then little by little I started breaking down and allowed myself, even though it was painful, to mourn. After talking with several people we have decided not to name our baby. After all, the Lord did not give the baby to us to name. After about a week and a half of some deep, hard emotions I was putting Micaiah to bed one night and it hit me. How amazingly beautiful the gift of Micaiah's life is. Not that I didn't know it before but it was so strong in that moment and my heart began to change from sad to grateful. I found in the coming days that the Lord used Micaiah to be my comfort. I couldn't hug or kiss him enough. I couldn't stop looking at him or get enough of his sweet voice. We have talked to Micaiah about what happened. We have been very open and honest with him. He has asked a couple of times about it but not in the last 2 weeks or so.
By late September things had started to feel a little normal around here. I started to feel ok again. Then one day I received an invitation in the mail to my nieces birthday party, my sister in laws little girl. Instantly I was very anxious. Almost a little panic-e. After feeling like i was getting a grip on things I realized I would come face to face with the physical reminder of our miscarriage. Something I knew I was not ready for. We live abbot 3 1/2 hours from my brother and sister in law and had not seen them since the announcement. For over a week I prayed and sought counsel because I was feeling so anxious. It would be like walking through the initial pain all over again. I don't want to go there Lord. I'm not ready In the times of praying I always thought "where are you Lord? why can't i feel you? why are you not calming my anxious heart" I was getting frustrated because he wasn't making this better. Later I would come to fond out he was working all along and telling me to wait when the only answer I was willing to hear was "okay I'll make every thing just dandy". Long story short, my sis in law came to visit my in laws (who live in Murfreesboro) kind of last minute exactly a week before my nieces party. Clark drug me to dinner kicking and screaming. After a really bad start to the night the ending was beautiful. It's what the Lord has been working on and preparing me for.
My sis in law called me into the back room and after a lengthy conversation (which shall remain mostly private) the Lord had calmed my anxious heart. You see, in that conservation my sis in law freed me from the burden of expectation. The expectation that I had to be present ...in HER presence. Something that is incredible painful for me right now. She told me to take as long as I needed to have space. I am so thank for her understanding and sympathy in our unique situation. Something I didn't even have to ask for but that she graciously gave. For even though her little one will always be a reminder of our miscarriage, one day the wound will be manageable. Something only the Lord can do with time and space.
The Lord has been my great comfort and strength in this time. He is teaching me things and doing things in me. Building character, refining me and increasing my dependence on HIM.....for that I am eternally grateful.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
The God that gives and takes away......
Monday August 22 my doctor confirmed that we were 7 weeks and 1 day pregnant. Monday August 29, after several events unfolded over the week my doctor confirmed we had miscarried over the weekend. Something we saw coming......
There are so many details to fill you in on (how things played out) and so many things my heart needs to say (what the Lord has done and what he is doing) but for right now this is all I can offer. Before our app. yesterday morning Clark and I fervently prayed for the Lord to breath life in our baby knowing the pregnancy had stopped progressing a couples weeks before but I also knew what my body was doing and had to face reality. We knew what to expect at the app. - no heartbeat.
This week has been a week of nothing but lows but for the first time in my walk with the Lord I experienced Philippians 4:7 - And THE PEACE of God that transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus. - The Lord has been so good to me this week and allowing me to hurt and grieve (and be mad) but to also have an incredible peace that He is in control and will be our great comfort. -Psalm 119:50;76- Thursday I physically felt the Lord's presence and physically felt Him holding my heart and guarding my mind; preparing me for what lay ahead. The Lord has never been more real to me.
So many things we would covet your prayers on but for now, as we are spent. We ask that you would pray that the Lord would continue to hold our hearts and that we would seek where to go from here.
We are hopeful for the future.
There are so many details to fill you in on (how things played out) and so many things my heart needs to say (what the Lord has done and what he is doing) but for right now this is all I can offer. Before our app. yesterday morning Clark and I fervently prayed for the Lord to breath life in our baby knowing the pregnancy had stopped progressing a couples weeks before but I also knew what my body was doing and had to face reality. We knew what to expect at the app. - no heartbeat.
This week has been a week of nothing but lows but for the first time in my walk with the Lord I experienced Philippians 4:7 - And THE PEACE of God that transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus. - The Lord has been so good to me this week and allowing me to hurt and grieve (and be mad) but to also have an incredible peace that He is in control and will be our great comfort. -Psalm 119:50;76- Thursday I physically felt the Lord's presence and physically felt Him holding my heart and guarding my mind; preparing me for what lay ahead. The Lord has never been more real to me.
So many things we would covet your prayers on but for now, as we are spent. We ask that you would pray that the Lord would continue to hold our hearts and that we would seek where to go from here.
We are hopeful for the future.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Fried Green Tomatoes
My all time favorite movie is Fried Green Tomatoes. Its hysterical, its dramatic and its eye opening. I have always thought at times I am very much like Iddgy and other times very much like Ruth. Before Micaiah, as I was doing things around the house I would pop the movie in and watch and listen i was going about getting stuff done. Other times, I plopped down on the couch and watch it through and through while reciting EVERY WORD! These days I don't get to watch it as often but from time to time I will and it always inspires me to make some fried green 'maters. Many of the places where the movie was film are actually places. ie: the Whistle Stop Cafe and Ruth's south Georgia home among several. Here is the actual recipe they used at the Whistle Stop.
The Whistle Stop Cafe - since 1927. My sister and I have always talked about taking a road trip here just to eat and be a part of this very cool piece of history.
Ingredients
4 large green tomatoes
2 eggs
1/2 cup milk
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
1/2 cup bread crumbs
2 teaspoons coarse kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
*****i also added 2 tsp of Lawry's seasoned salt*****
1 quart vegetable oil for frying
Directions
Slice tomatoes 1/2 inch thick. Discard the ends.
Whisk eggs and milk together in a medium-size bowl.
Scoop flour onto a plate. Mix cornmeal, bread crumbs and salt and pepper on another plate. Dip tomatoes into flour to coat. Then dip the tomatoes into milk and egg mixture. Dredge in breadcrumbs to completely coat.
In a large skillet, pour vegetable oil (enough so that there is 1/2 inch of oil in the pan) and heat over a medium heat. Place tomatoes into the frying pan in batches of 4 or 5, depending on the size of your skillet. Do not crowd the tomatoes, they should not touch each other. When the tomatoes are browned, flip and fry them on the other side. Drain them on paper towels.
The Whistle Stop Cafe - since 1927. My sister and I have always talked about taking a road trip here just to eat and be a part of this very cool piece of history.
Ingredients
4 large green tomatoes
2 eggs
1/2 cup milk
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
1/2 cup bread crumbs
2 teaspoons coarse kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
*****i also added 2 tsp of Lawry's seasoned salt*****
1 quart vegetable oil for frying
Directions
Slice tomatoes 1/2 inch thick. Discard the ends.
Whisk eggs and milk together in a medium-size bowl.
Scoop flour onto a plate. Mix cornmeal, bread crumbs and salt and pepper on another plate. Dip tomatoes into flour to coat. Then dip the tomatoes into milk and egg mixture. Dredge in breadcrumbs to completely coat.
In a large skillet, pour vegetable oil (enough so that there is 1/2 inch of oil in the pan) and heat over a medium heat. Place tomatoes into the frying pan in batches of 4 or 5, depending on the size of your skillet. Do not crowd the tomatoes, they should not touch each other. When the tomatoes are browned, flip and fry them on the other side. Drain them on paper towels.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Sweetly Broken
I have said it several times before. Music moves me. The words to this song are so deep and so true.
Sweetly Broken - Jeremy Riddler
To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of its suffering I do drink
Of its work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just
At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees, and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I'm sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified
You've called me out of death
You've called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I'm reconciled
In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness
Sweetly Broken - Jeremy Riddler
To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of its suffering I do drink
Of its work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just
At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees, and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I'm sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified
You've called me out of death
You've called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I'm reconciled
In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness
Thursday, August 11, 2011
St. Augustine family day
Most of my memories growing up involve some kind of water. Every summer we went to St. Augustine Beach for vacation! I've been there and done so much there I feel like I grew up there! Where my lives, is only an hour from the beach and down town. Clark and I always say if we ever move back to Florida that's where we want to be! We love the atmosphere and I LOVE the water! We decided to take a family day (away from my billion siblings and parents) to the beach, then on to do some shopping and eating! It was such a sweet time for our family.
This is where we ate! We've eaten here before so we knew it was good. Just about anything you get there is great!
Our view from the table. Micaiah was excited to see the boats going by!
The blackened chicken sandwich smothered in mushrooms is something I've gotten before. Their fries are seasoned with oregano and parmesan cheese. YUMMY!
If you've ever been to St George St downtown you know Kilwins! After dinner we stopped in for a little treat.
Most of you that know me, know that I am not a sweet eater (i'm more of a pasta kind of girl). But the one sweet that I've always had a sweet tooth for is caramel apples! So yummy! I get one every time we go here!
This is where we ate! We've eaten here before so we knew it was good. Just about anything you get there is great!
Our view from the table. Micaiah was excited to see the boats going by!
The blackened chicken sandwich smothered in mushrooms is something I've gotten before. Their fries are seasoned with oregano and parmesan cheese. YUMMY!
If you've ever been to St George St downtown you know Kilwins! After dinner we stopped in for a little treat.
Most of you that know me, know that I am not a sweet eater (i'm more of a pasta kind of girl). But the one sweet that I've always had a sweet tooth for is caramel apples! So yummy! I get one every time we go here!
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